Monday, November 10, 2008

Comfort


My man Gareth's mother was hospitalized early this morning in critical condition from a heart attack. It was a long day spent at the hospital with his family, waiting for news on her condition. Being a doctor himself, they couldn't sugar coat things with him and give him false hopes. But being the man, or maybe the doctor that he is, he made sure his family retained some hope and kept their spirits on the brighter side. For most of the day I even thought he was believing it himself until we left to check on the animals and things at her home.


When we pulled up to her house he sat in the car for a moment and I could tell he was fighting back tears and was lost deep in thought. I figured I would give him a moment alone so I asked him for the keys to the house. He said he was fine and turned the car off and got out with me and walked inside not saying a word.


Once inside we we're greeted by the dog at the door and as I watched him play with the dog and walk into the kitchen to feed him he had a smile on his face and asked me if I wanted anything to drink or eat. Everything seemed like a normal visit except she wasn't there.


I went into the living room, turned on a table lamp and fed the fish. As I turned around he was standing in the doorway looking around the room sipping a glass of soda. He handed me a glass and started telling me stories of his childhood and his mother and father as he reminisced of his time living in the house. After a couple of minutes he said he was going to let the dog out and then go upstairs and make sure everything was OK before we headed out.


I went to the kitchen with our two empty glasses and decided to wash the dishes that were in the sink. I thought we should take the dog to his place, so I gathered up his food and dishes and put them in a bag. After a few minutes of wondering where he was, I walked upstairs to see what he was doing. I found him sitting on his mothers bed, head bowed, tears rolling down his face. I wiped a tear from his cheek and he grabbed my hand and kissed it and pulled me down to sit next to him. He laid his head on my shoulder and cried as I held him. I was trying not to cry since one of us had to stay strong, but I love him with all my heart and seeing him so sad broke my heart. I remembered the feelings I had when my mother passed and I realized there was nothing I could say to make him feel better. All I could do was be strong for him and be there for him to lean on as I have leaned on him before, so many times.


After a couple minutes I told him I thought we should take the dog with us to his place so he's not alone until she comes home. The thought of this seemed to cheer him up a bit and he leaned in and kissed me. He kissed me hard holding onto me as he pushed me back onto his mothers bed. The thought of being on his mothers bed didn't escape me. I asked him what he thought his mother would say if she knew he was kissing me on her bed. He laughed at the thought and said lets go home. We gathered the dog and went to his place where we are now.


After taking a long shower and eating some food, we curled up on the couch where he's currently sleeping with his head on my lap. The dog is curled up on a chair nearby as I sit here typing this. All is quiet right now, only the clicking of the clock and my strokes on the keyboard making a noise. I was laying over his shoulder watching him sleep and started to rub his hair like my mother used to do to me when she comforted me. But he started to stir and I didn't want to wake him, so I decided to open the laptop and type a post. Experience tells me that bad news usually comes in the early morning. So right now I'm finding it hard to sleep and I keep staring at the phone on the table. Hopefully that call won't come and things will look better in the morning light.


For now, I'm going to stay here next to him, hold him as tight as possible and hope that he gets to have at least one more chance to hear his mothers voice, hold her hand and tell her all the things he wished he would have told her but was putting off for another day.

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

So sad, but written very sweet. You have me in tears. I'll say a prayer for ya'll.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear. Anything you need, call me.

Unknown said...

I hope everything will turn out ok. My thoughts are with you, Gareth and his family. If you need to talk, you have my e-mail.

Anonymous said...

I hope everything will be well. It's good that you're there to comfort him and hopefully he feels better now.

Ing said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope he does get the chance. Will keep you all in my thoughts and hope for the best.

Joey said...

Sorry to hear that. Wishing him, her, and you the best.

Unknown said...

Time heals everything. I prefer to look onwards, and zoom outwards. Bigger picture. And then the bigger picture to the bigger picture.


All the best to you guys.

Anonymous said...

Parabéns pelo seu blog e postar suas fotos fantásticas que eu gostava muito de perder o seu blog. muito obrigado. Receba uma saudação cordial. Peço desculpas pela publicidade.

American Irish said...

Thanks everyone for the nice comments. I let him know you're thinking of him. It's morning now and he is doing ok. No bad phone call and we're told she is stable. But I'm knackered now. Need more sleep.

Anonymous said...

My thoughts and prayers to your man’s mother and to you guys.

Josh said...

glad to know she's stable.

Anonymous said...

Hope everything is going better today. Thinking of you.

Y said...

My heart goes out to you,guys!I really hope everything will be alright!
I just found this blog and after I read some entries all I can say is:I love it!:)

Many hugs
Toni

Brian said...

Hey i hope things turn out ok, ill be praying for all of you.

American Irish said...

I just got home, its early morning friday. Wanted to update everyone to say she is now doing better and she is in stable condition and seems like she will pull through this. I'm tired, going to bed, just wanted to give an update and say thanks for the nice comments for his mother.

Unknown said...

I don't know anymore how even I came to your site but I read of you and your man's bad news. My heart was sad for you both but then it was singing when I read and was able to feel the love that you have for each other. I send Peace and Good to you both and to his mother. Good wishes and warm regards though space and time from USA (Maine) to Ireland. Etienne Guillory

Steve said...

I just found your blog last week and can't keep myself from feeling your life. My thoughts and prayers are with your whole family. Glad to hear that MIL is doing better.

Unknown said...

I'm glad that she is stable and likely to pull through.

American Irish said...

She's still stable as of this morning and thanks again to everyone for the nice comments. You all have kind hearts to take the time out to leave such nice comments. It's appreciated more than I can express.